You Caught Me Spankin' It

Stephen Lynch

ok now ro the breakfast table

i felt like i could cry

i tried so hard but wasn't able

to look you in the eye

for i am feeling so much shame

yes i have brought disgrace

i can tell i've soiled my good name

by the look upon your face

well it seems last night you caught me spankin it

no use denying it i was really crankin it

well dry you eyes

don't be so sad

if you could just forgive me

and talk to me dad

talk to me dad

woo

i didn't hear you enter

no i didn't hear the door

with my hand upon my member

and my pants upon the floor

now daddy i'm ashamed

and i completely understand

if you never want a hug again

or even shake my hand

oh no

well it seems last night you caught me spankin it

no use denying it i was really crankin it

well dry your eyes

don't be so sad

but i wouldn't use those tissues

they've already been had

talk to me dad

the look upon your face

made my swelling gland diminish

so i said 'could you close the door

i really wanna finish'

thirty more seconds

and if all had gone as planned

you'd have seen your future grandchildren

dripping from my hand

well it seems last night you caught me spankin it

no use denying it i was really crankin it

well dry your eyes

don't be so sad

just because it was your bed

it's not that bad

talk to me dad

when i was only seventeen

you told me it was dirty

so it must be really creepy

when your kid is pushing thirty

well it seems last night you caught me spankin it

no use denying it i was really crankin it

so dry your eyes

don't be so sad

but i wouldn't use those tissues

they've already been

and just because it wa your bed

its not that

daddy daddy please forgive me

talk to me dad

talk to me dad