Toll Booth Willie

Adam Sandler

[Car approaches]

[Toll Booth Willie:] "Welcome to Worchester. Dollar twenty-five please."

[M1:] "Hey, how ya doin' Toll Booth Willie?"

[Toll Booth Willie:] "Good! Thanks fer askin, pop!"

[M1:] "Aww, that's great, you know, considering yer a fuckin' idiot!"

[Pays toll and drives off]

[Toll Booth Willie:] "Go fuck yourself you son of a bitch!

I'll come right outta the booth and fuckin' whack ya, you fuckin' prick!"

[Another car approaches]

[M2:] "Hey, hey, Willie! Hows it going?"

[Toll Booth Willie:] "Hey, can't complain, pop. Hows 'bout you?"

[M2:] "Oh, great, great. How much?"

[Toll Booth Willie:] "The state charges a dollar twenty-five, pop."

[M2:] "That's fine. Now should I give you the money,

or should I shove the quarters directly up your fat ass!?"

[Pays toll and drives off]

[Toll Booth Willie:] "Why you fuckin' hard on!

I'll fucking Carlton Fisk yer fuckin' head with a Louise-ville fuckin' slugger!

Whadya think of that ass fuck!?"

[Another car approaches]

[F1:] "Hi Willie."

[Toll Booth Willie:] "Oh, nice to see ya M'am. Not a bad day, huh?"

[F1:] "Well, I'm a little lost. Could you help me out?

I hear your the best with directions."

[Toll Booth Willie:] "Well I know my way around New England.

I can tell ya that much. So where ya headed?"

[F1:] "Well, I was just wondering exactly which is the best way

to drive up your ass. You know, if you'd tell me,

I'd appreciate it, you fuckin' prick."

[Drives off]

[Toll Booth Willie:] "You fuckin' bitch! Fuck you!

You forgot to pay the fuckin' toll you dirty whore!

I'll fuckin' drop you with a boot to the fuckin' skull you cum guzzling queen!"

[Another car approaches]

[M3:] "Hey Willie."

[Toll Bo

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