Horrible Pain Within My Heart

My Ruin

I invoke him...

and he comes to me in my dreams dressed in black.

He speak in a language only I can understand.

His hands are warm, his breath is hot

he is the horrible pain within my heart

my religion, my sanctuary, my church, my sacrifice,

my profession my exorcism...

my worship in progress

I have no other lover...

now until forever

he is magic and when he kisses me I can taste him on my lips like an elixir

far from innocent he is pure evil, a sinners prayer...

a saints desire.

F or him I would walk through fire for him...

I have walked through fire.

To draw him I want so bad...

one gift I'll never have.

He drives a stake into my soul makes me bleed,

makes me whole, drinks me, devours me, intoxicates me...

with his love

hate devotion faith as beautiful as Jesus Christ

he is as brutal as the depths of hell.

In my dreams I press my mouth agains his and I fell

heaven... horror... terror.

He looks at me with that look I call his serial killer

look like he wants to fuck me and kill me all at the same time.

It scares me..

it turns me on, his eyes are brown his dare is intense...

meaningful, powerful, maybe that's why he is so fuckin scary...

because he means it.

Sometimes he tells me he loves me as he looks at me with that look.

Sometimes he doesn't have to.

I've never felt a man look at me with that look,

it's almost freaky... uncomfortable.... sexy.

I guess I know he could never really chop off my hands, or could he? .