Dane Cook

(Cheering)"YES!...Yes..yes..yes. Yes..Yes..Y-E-S. Yes.We are going to have a relationship tonight. Im gunna go out with you.Were gunna make sweet sweet comedy love with each other.And then suddenly without warning im not even gunna call you guys anymore.The last thing you had ever heard me say was, 'hey,ill cal you guys later'.And i never call.But you hear from the grapevine, im dating a younger sexier crowd.And then im really happy, but im not happy.Cuz i think about you guys.And about a year from now, im gunna call weeping in the middle of the night,'you were the best crowd i ever had...(sniff) you really listened to me...and I didnt know the crowd I had until you despersed.'Then were gunna get together, were gunna hang out, and maybe will all like ya kno run around town and smash windows and cause destruction.And ill make jokes and one of you guys will turn and be like,'haha Dane your a riot!'and ill go,'IM A RIOT?YOUR A FUCKING RIOT!'GET IT?Thats how things are gunna go down tonight!