Some say the end is near
Some say we′ll see Armageddon soon
Certainly hope we willI sure could use a vacation from this
Bullshit three ring circus sideshow of
Freaks here in this hopeless fucking hole we call LA
The only way to fix it is to flush it all away
Any fucking time, any fucking day
Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona Bay
Fret for your figure and fret for your latte
And fret for your lawsuit and fret for your hairpiece
And fret for your Prozac and fret for your pilot
And fret for your contract and fret for your car
It′s a bullshit three ring circus sideshow of
Freaks here in this hopeless fucking hole we call LA
The only way to fix it is to flush it all away
Any fucking time, any fucking day
Learn to swim, I'll see you down in Arizona Bay
Some say a comet will fall from the sky
Followed by meteor showers and tidal waves
Followed by fault lines that cannot sit still
Followed by millions of dumbfounded dipshits
Some say the end is near
Some say we'll see Armageddon soon
Certainly hope we will
I sure could use a vacation from this
Stupid shit, silly shit, stupid shit
One great big festering neon distraction
I′ve a suggestion to keep you all occupied
Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim
′Cause Mom's gonna fix it all soon
Mom′s comin' round to put it back the way it ought to be
(Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim)
(Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim)
Fuck L. Ron Hubbard and fuck all his clones
Fuck all these gun-toting hip gangster wannabes
(Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim)
(Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim)
Yeah, fuck retro anything, fuck your tattoos
Fuck all you junkies and fuck your short memory
(Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim)
(Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim)
Yeah, fuck smiley glad-hands with hidden agendas
Fuck these dysfunctional, insecure actresses
(Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim)
(Learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim, learn to swim)
′Cause I'm praying for rain
I′m praying for tidal waves
I wanna see the ground give way
I wanna watch it all go down
Mom, please flush it all away
I want to see it go right in and down
I wanna watch it go right in
Watch you flush it all away
Yeah, time to bring it down again
Yeah, don't just call me pessimist
Try and read between the lines
And I can't imagine why you wouldn′t
Welcome any change, my friend
I wanna see it come down
Bring it down
Suck it down
Flush it down
