Poor Unfortunate Souls

The Little Mermaid

I admit that in the past I've been a nasty

They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch

But you'll find that nowadays

I've mended all my ways

Repented, seen the light and made a switch

True? Yes



And I fortunately know a little magic

It's a talent that I always have possessed

And here lately, please don't laugh

I use it on behalf

Of the miserable, lonely and depressed

(Pathetic)



Poor unfortunate souls

In pain

In need

This one longing to be thinner

That one wants to get the girl

And do I help them?

Yes, indeed

Those poor unfortunate souls

So sad

So true

They come flocking to my cauldron

Crying, "Spells, Ursula please!"

And I help them?

Yes, I do



Now it's happened once or twice

Someone couldn't pay the price

And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals

Yes, I've had the odd complaint

But on the whole I've been a saint

To those poor unfortunate souls



( [Ursula:] Have we got a deal?

[Ariel:] If I become human, I'll never be with my father or sisters again.

[Ursula:] But you'll have your man. Life's full of tough choices, innit?

Oh - and there is one more thing. We haven't discussed the subject of payment.

[Ariel:] But I don't have any -

[Ursula:] I'm not asking much. Just a token, really, a trifle. What I want from you is . . . your voice.

[Ariel:] But without my voice, how can I -

[Ursula:] You'll have your looks! Your pretty face! And don't underestimate the importance of body language! Ha! )



The men up there don't like a lot of blabber

They think a girl who gossips is a bore

Yes, on land it's much preferred

For ladies not to say a word

And after all, dear, what is idle prattle for?



Come on, they're not all that impressed with conversation

True gentlemen avoid it when they can

But they dote and swoon and fawn

On a lady who's withd