One

Stig Of The Dump

La, la, la
This is a poem called Roses are red
Roses are red, violets are blueI′m so fucking glad I'm not in a relationship with you, bitch!

One is the loneliest number that you′ll ever do
Two can be as bad as one
It's the loneliest number since the number one

Listen, we were tighter than a miser
Always kicked it like a mighter
Wherever she resided, she could find me right beside her
I used to play it down as though I only kinda liked her
Her flirty little disses made her eyes shine brighter

I used to think, "How the hell did I find her?"
Watching as she carefully applied her eyeliner
Mystified by h
I was sucking in until she had me dancing to her tune just like the pied piper

I was non the wiser
Blindly in love, oblivious to the fact that in time she'd switch up
And she-did-switch-up, proper flipped out
Always on the war path looking for a big row (what?)
And I′d oblige, I mean, come on, I got a big mouth
Aiming at her high horse tryna knock the thing down
Eventually, I got kicked out
But I′d rather go back to sleeping rough than with that bitch now

One is the loneliest number that you'll ever do
Two can be as bad as one
It′s the loneliest number since the number one

The last lass I had things started out casually
The type of girl that I would hang around happily
I became attached to her ever so gradually
Then naturally, it turned into a fucking shit factory

What a catastrophe, an absolute mess
A new Mrs with a bag of new stress
Sometimes I had an attitude (yes)
But when I'm treated l like a mug, that′s what you have to expect

Jealousy, scrutiny, stressing me, stupidly
Messing with my head 'til it affected me musically
I can′t explain the nightmare that it grew to be
What a huge relief to be away from that lunacy
Usually, I'm really not the type of guy to hold a grudge
I don't know that falling out of love is part of growing up
But when you ladies acting crazy like she′s smoking dust
You′re better on your ones 'cause two can be as lonely, trust

One is the loneliness number that you′ll ever do
Two can be as bad as one
It's the loneliness number since the number one

What you crying for?
What you crying for?
I didn′t do anything
What you crying for?
You gonna tell me what the problem is
How can I make you better if you don't tell me what the problem is?

You know crying makes you look really fat
All characters appearing in the song are fictitious
Any resemblance to real persons living or dead is purely coincidental
Honestly

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