Young son, sensitive type and shyness held its grips
Rode my bike up on that sidewalk
Never popped wheelies, never did flipsAll of them bad thoughts in my head
I fought them alone, I never said shit
Best friend bald from chemo treatments
Hurtful visuals stuck in my head
Never once comfort, never once needed
Never once dealt and felt my feelings
Never asked how my grandpa died
Never asked how my mom was feeling
Hid behind humor, hid behind jokes
VCR tapes was how I coped
The plan of attack was not these panic attacks
Both manic or mannequin acts
Cassette recorder, rapping then playing it back
Erasing the traces of that,
Too embarrassed, hated my voice
Dubbed it all over
Watched my father work on the motor of his old Ford,
Long before tour, long before pressing record
Long before blood was poured
Long before sweat was poured
Long before rivers of tears
Don′t even bring up those tears
Don't even bring up those years
Don′t ever bring up the, fights through the wall
The nights we would bawl
The nights the cops would get called
Commotion, brother says "here,
Putting that seashell to my ear
Peaceful sounds of an ocean near
Wishing it could drown out sounds
Right here in the midwest
Broken, but them are the breaks
Everlong like "The colour and shape"
Supposedly, rosaries, covered and draped
Develop hate with a polaroid shake
Picture perfect, pixels hurting
Diving in like "the truth, it hurts"
Like Dirt McGurt in a cleaner shirt
Games cat and mouse or they Courtney, Kurt
Generations left meditating
Makes big business from medications
Gurus with knowledge of voodoo and college
Inspires a fire from truth so despondent
Hooked on them phonics, wish upon comets
Sheryl Swoops playing grown man hoops
Magic wand, like it's point and poof
Imagination fills up my room
Pile perspectives, classes, electives
First born son, parents overprotective
I can count on ten fingers but not on myself
Fell down that rabbit hole, which way is hell?
Devils and demons so linked to that treason
Rip away feelings to get back to healing
Stealing a moment, a loving component
Truly yourself when you take and you own it
I'm sarcastic with scars jagged
Got Shakespeared cuz Im so tragic
A sweet beard, voice weird
But look in the mirror and I see myself clear
Shatter this pattern, channel Aladdin
Like blue Genies and blue meanies
Yellow the submarine
New is this healing
Fuck all these feelings
Just weapons concealed
