I heard there is no Christmas in the silly middle east
No trees, no snow, no Santa Clause, they have different religious beliefs
They believe in Muhammad and not in our holiday
And so every December I got to the middle east and say
Hey there Mr. Muslim, merry fucking Christmas
Put down that book the Koran, and here's some holiday wishes
In case you haven't noticed, it's Jesus' birthday
So get off your heathen Muslim ass and fucking celebrate
There is no holiday season in India I've heard
They don't hang up their stockings and that is just absurd
They've never read a Christmas story, they don't know what Rudolph is about
And that is why in December I'll go to India and shout
Hey there Mr. Hinduist, merry fucking Christmas
Drink egg nog and eat some beef and pass it to the missus
In case you haven't noticed its Jesus' birthday
So get of your heathen Hindu ass and fucking celebrate
Now I heard that in Japan everyone just lives in sin
They pray to several gods and put needles in their skin
On December 25th all they do is eat a cake
And that is why I go to Japan and walk around and say
Hey there Mr. Shintoist, merry fucking Christmas
God is gonna kick your ass you infidelic pagan scum
In case you haven't noticed, there's festive things to do
So let's all rejoice for Jesus and merry fucking Christmas to you
On Christmas day
I travel around the world and say
Down with Krishnas, Buddists and all you atheists too
Merry fucking Christmas to you
Thank you Mr. Hat
