Clap your hands and catch a fly
Bite an apple, shut your eyes
Moisturize, your skin is dryGhosts are ringing off the bell
Tell your friends you′re doing well
Call a doctor 'bout your health
And I think you deserve an Oscar
For pretending nothing′s wrong
Every day there's something else
But you carry yourself
Like the greatest actor
Acting like the world is not
Breaking up before your eyes
You deserve a prize
Ooh
Take a supplement for sun
Try and sleep with everyone
Know you're doing nothing wrong
Kiss the season on the mouth
Go for walks and hug a clown
All the funny ones are down
And I think you deserve an Oscar
For pretending nothing′s wrong
Every day there′s something else
But you carry yourself
Like the greatest actor
Acting like the world is not
Breaking up before your eyes
You deserve a prize
Watch a war under the sheets
Get a coffee down the street
Plastic bags in harmony
Everybody's incomplete
And who′s the best at saving face?
Who's the toughest in the race?
Forget the Pope, you have the grace
You′re my nomination
And you deserve an Oscar
For pretending nothing's wrong
Every day, it bursts the seams
But you put on your jeans
Like the greatest actor
Acting like the world is not
Breaking up and slowly dying
You deserve a prize
