That′s a joke, that's a joke
Ha-ha-ha, they gettin′ roast
Ha-ha-ha (That's a joke), that's a joke (ha-ha)Ha-ha-ha, what a joke! (Ha, ha-ha-ha)
Aw, yeah, yeah, yeah, I′ma get the last laugh now right here
I remember I was gettin′ by until I had to get it all
I could just be a movie star now, but I'm just gettin′ to the punchline of everything
So buckle up 'cause this a long ride like a limousine
My girl like when I spoon her all night like vanilla bean, I like drinkin′ Hennessy
I got a lotta rapper in me, pause, now they wrapped around my finger, wedding ring
Everything, gotta line it up, super calculated like a TI-83 Plus (whoa)
I was out in China, gettin' the bread rappin′ to 'em
No, I wasn't, but you believe me ′cause I′m the type of guy
That could be rappin' out in China, I′m swimmin' in vagina
I get it, I do it, sometimes I fuck for fitness
I got the pussy off Olympics, sweatin′ like Olympics
I need to take a breather, but she pleadin', say she need it
Back to back to back like I′m Kobe, Shaq, I don't know
But I got Stuart Scott up in my ear and he like, "Dave, you gotta booya on that back" (booya)
If I went back on Bumble, bet their servers probably crumble, I am just another muggle
'Til I′m not one, it′s hard to say nothin' like you up on Hot Ones
I just got the new facts and they say I′m top one
Women shave their pussy smooth, lookin' like a Ken doll
Should′ve said a Barbie doll, oh, well
Goodbye, au revoir, y'all in limbo, raised the bar
I get on racks like my arm bar, I gave my best friend my old car
I tried to tell ya, I′m a winner, it's just a matter of when
I hit the club up with the players then get brunch with GM
Holy smoke, these Gold singles make me pout
If the shit ain't Platinum, what the fuck we talking ′bout?
Baby, I just bought a house, baby, ain′t no shoes allowed
Baby, my girl so goddamn tan, she look racially ambiguous
Picture this, I'm on prime time
Gettin′ head while I watch myself up on prime time
Gettin' head and I′m even in a few commercials
And the commercial breaks sellin' sex, literally, what′s your hundo?
I got the block on lock like I'm Mutombo
The way I write, you might as well call me Trumbo
This check for me or am I seein' double?
I would lift weights at the gym but then I′m like, "Why?" (Why would I do that?)
I′m a nice guy, gasp when I walk by
I just got a package in the mail and I fucked twice
Juggin', finessin′, LeBron up in my mentions
They peanut butter jealous, I'm on her like Nutella
These motherfuckers, they done lost me, everything I′m doin' lofty
I′m kinda wearin' on 'em like a soft tee, I got it ground up like coffee
I had an ′06 write it up, wildin′ out
Back in '06, I was talkin′ 'bout graduatin′, now I'm on Wild ′n Out
Time has changed, got a lil grayness in my hair, I don't care
I gotta face it, I ain't never knowin′ how the money payment workin′
There's a person, couple people probably, I don′t even bother
Big up to my father, he was so responsible and so logical
What am I even doin'? Why am I rappin′ like this? I'm such a loser
I hate when rappers try to rap fast
Make the kids dance, women lick my anus
Thinkpieces on me, New York Times, I made it
I′m fuckin' like a fable, doggystyle why she kegel
Then we eat a couple bagels with The LOX, word to Jada (Jada told me I'm the best)
And guess what? I′m the "it" guy for America
Don′t mind me, I'm over here just redefinin′ the alpha male
Don't mind me, I′m over here just gettin' all the opps (all the opps)
How they rappin′?
I been workin' on my craft, makin' it happen (work, work)
We should make a bracket
Don′t forget that I′m the comedian, but I'm better than the rappers?
That′s a joke, that's a joke
Ha-ha-ha, they gettin′ roast
Ha-ha-ha (that's a joke), that′s a joke (ha-ha)
Ha-ha-ha, what a joke! (Ha, ha-ha-ha)