Wet Dream
by Kip Adadda
It was the 41st of April, being a quadruple leap year.
I was driving through downtown Atlantis.
My Barracuda was in the shop, so I was in a rented Stingray, and it was overheating.
I pulled off into a Shell station.
They said I'd blown a seal.
I said, "Fix the damn thing and leave my private life out of it, okay pal?"
While they were doing that I walked over to a place called "The Oyster Bar" -- a real dive.
But I knew the owner -- he used to play for the Dolphins.
I said "Hi, Gil!" You have to yell, he's hard of herring.
Gil was also down on his luck.
Fact is, he was barely keeping his head below water.
I bellied up to the sandbar.
He poured me the usual -- Rusty snail, hold the grunnion, shaken, not stirred.
With a peanut-butter and jellyfish sandwich on the side -- heavy on the mako.
I slipped him a fin - on porpoise.
I was feelin' good. I even dropped a sand dollar in the box for Jerry's squids.
For the halibut.
Well, the place was crowded.
We were packed in like sardines.
They were all there to listen to the big band sounds of Tommy Dorsal.
What sole.
Tommy was rockin' the place with a very popular tuna, Salmon-chanted evening,
And the stage was surrounded by screaming groupers -- Probably there to see the bass player.
One of them was this cute little yellowtail, and she was giving me the eye.
So I figured this was my chance for a little fun.
You know, piece of pisces.
But she said things I just couldn't fathom.
She was too deep. Seemed to be under a lot of pressure.
Boy, could she drink. She drank like a- She drank a lot.
I said "What's your sign?" She said, "Aquarium."
I said, "Great! Let's get tanked!"
I invited her up to my place for a little midnight bait.
I said, "C'mon, baby, it'll only take a few minnows."
She threw me that same old line, "Not tonight. I've got a haddoc
