Suicide Note

Johnette Napolitano

Every night

you wrote another line

with a bloody broken bottle

and every day

you wish it away

why dont you

pull the pin on that grenade you coddle

I wanted to believe

bodies swingin from trees

Strugglin to stand

with your head in your hands

A stoic last stand of a dying man



I wanted to believe as I watched your world crumble in your hands

I wanted to believe as you raised your glass to your last stand

and I wanted to believe you would win the war in your head that I did not understand

I did not understand



Every night

the questions poured out

of your wounded eyes

damn dark things

Every day

you used to pray

listen to the black raven sing

you wanted to believe

as you were falling to your knees

struggling to stand

with your life in your hand

the sad last stand of a broken man



I wanted to believe as I as watched your world crumble in your hand

I wanted to believe as you raised your glass to your last stand

I wanted to believe you would win the war in your head that i did not understand

i did not understand



I wanted to believe as I watched your world crumble in your hands

I wanted to believe as you raised your glass to your last stand

I wanted to believe that you would win the war in your head that I did not understand



I did not understand

and the questions poured out

and the questions pour out

[out of your body]

did not understand

[and spilled on your floor]

did not understand

[pushing you down x2]

did not understand

[holding you down x2]

did not understand

the sound of you falling

did not understand

as the trembling heart of a dying man

did not understand



the sound of a trembling heart