Watching The Detectives

Elvis Costello

Nice girls, not one with a defect

Cellophane shrink-wrapped, so correct

Red dogs under illegal legs

She looks so good that he gets down and begs



(CHORUS) She is watching the detectives

"Ooh, he's so cute"

She is watching the detectives

When they shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot

They beat him up until the teardrops start

But he can't be wounded 'cause he's got no heart



Long shot at that jumping sign

Invisible shivers running down my spine

Cut to baby taking off her clothes

Close-up of the sign that says "We never close"

He snatches at you and you match his cigarette

She pulls the eyes out with a face like a magnet

I don't know how much more of this I can take

She's filing her nails while they're dragging the lake



(REPEAT CHORUS)



You think you're alone until you realize you're in it

Now fear is here to stay, love is here for a visit

They call it instant justice when it's past the legal limit

Someone's scratching at the window, I wonder who is it?

The detectives come to check if you belong to the parents

Who are ready to hear the worst about their daughter's disappearance

Though it nearly took a miracle to get you to stay

It only took my little fingers to blow you away



Just like watching the detectives

Don't get cute

It's just like watching the detectives

I get so angry when the teardrops start

But he can't be wounded 'cause he's got no heart



Watching the detectives

It's just like watching the detectives

Watching the detectives

Watching the detectives

(REPEAT AND FADE)

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