Back when I was goin' to school,
I never learned a thing.
All I did was daydream,
A-waitin' for the bell to ring.
I had a certain teacher,
I always tried to impress her.
When she stood up in the classroom,
I would mentally undress her.
Then one day I decided,
That I would write a little letter.
She said the spellin' was a masterpiece,
The punctuation could be better.
I understood what she was saying,
I got the gist of her sentiment.
She said I don't mean to be degrading,
But here's the way that it shoulda went:
I love you - period.
Do you love me - question mark.
Please, please - exclamation point.
I want to hold you - in parentheses.
Right on up to high school,
People said I was a writin' fool.
All my letters became really great,
With punctuation that was never late.
But I was havin' trouble meetin' girls.
I never knew the things to say.
Soon I had 'em all overwhelmed,
When they heard me talk this way, like this:
I love you - period.
Do you love me - question mark.
Please, please - exclamation point.
I want to hold you - in parentheses.
