Well I was driving down I95 the other night
Somebody nearly cut me right off the road
I decided it wasn't gonna do any good to get mad
So I wrote a song about him instead
It goes like this:
Were you born an asshole
Or did you work at it your whole life?
Either way it worked out fine
'Cause you're an asshole tonight
Yes you're an A - S - S - H - O - L - E
And don'tcha try to blame it o me
You deserve all the credit
You're an asshole tonight
You were an asshole yesterday
You're an asshole tonight
I've got a feeling
You'll be an asshole the rest of your life
I was talking to your mother
Just the other night
I told her I thought you were an asshole
She said "Yes, I think you're right"
And all your friends are assholes
'Cause you've known them your whole life
And somebody told me
You've got an asshole for a wife
Were you born an asshole
Or did you work at it your whole life?
Either way it worked out fine
'Cause you're an asshole tonight
