Epic Rap Battles of Irvine
Middle Earth
VersusMesa Court
Begin
Yeah we′re called the Middle but you're the one that′s mid
I admit we stay humble but for this you gotta sit
Not my problem you so far off the map you have a bridge
Not to mention you put way too much care in your fits
It's embarrassing, harrowing
We're better in like: everything
Gondolin to Rivendell, we′re Balin like the Lord of Rings
Snowbourn to be great, Evenstar got that bling
Spittin′ Shadowfax, no cap, just think
And so what Mesa got the cool kids
Now we got the smart kids
Rep that S.T.E.M major for life
Cute bunnies all night
While your trashy nasty raccoons outside
Set that pettiness aside
Saw the towers that you had and made it better
(So hecking nice)
We actually follow quiet hours
(That's f′in right)
A home-y type of feel, a classic kinda vibe
You could never ever be us but you could always try
Hey Middle Earth
How are you worms feelin' livin′ in the Irvine dirt?
When I'm on your turf
It looks like I′m walkin' around in a giant urn
Your army of the dead can bow
To the fire that this Mesa burns (adlib)
We gotta social life day 'n′ night you admire
While you hobbits stay home alone, so much Shire
A horrid dorm, like Mordor′s orcs
Your thorns rose a war
And we know your website fakes pics like a sorority
This flow unordinary, we explode like Mount Doom
It's true, you′re more irrelevant than Zendaya in Dune
So, (doja) say adieu like a weddin'
But even Merry couldn′t save Pippins from choking
Then throwin'-up Brandy′s food (pft)
Your only argument is you're closer to campus (oh, haha)
That's just as useful as discussions on Canvas
Your communities cowardly
Covering the reality of awful commodities
Causin′ a lot of these freshman to get up and leave
You′re in our Court, kneel to the lord
We royalty
(Irvine Company)
Everybody give it up for the pair of runners-up
Mesa, Middle, just a little underdressed for this club
Take it from the top dog, pack it up and walk off
Never start a turf war with the owner of the dirt, tchyah
Simple business: you live, I profit, see?
Simple economics, did you not learn that in college?
Apologies. Didn't realize your IQ wouldn′t be so high
So here's some etymology
I′m the father of The Company with money like monopoly
With Benjamin clips
Got you diminishing your pockets in minutes
The bill skyrockets and pivots
Around the docket, you're finished
If you′re within my city limits
Stack it up, fill my cup, give it all up to me!
I'm the one, turn and run with your college degree
Every minute, every hour, every dollar in hand
Is a payment in manner of seconds to the lord of the land (ah)
(One more time)
You talk a big walk with just a dollar in your pocket
Sayin' you so powerful with those fancy apartments
The way you look so green for the money
Don′t you turn nauseous?
Here′s that bag you earned
Now go empty yourself like a socket
Though I can say you been making them profits
You are farther from perfect
Way too blatantly dishonest
You make others go broke
Sussy baka in those clothes
I bet you lie on the daily, call that Pinocchio
You're called Company but no one wants you
Started killin′ us
But that means at lease we're increasing to haunt you
The interest flipped
Made you rent some bars so hopeless
The rap gods came back to give you an eviction notice
Just a truth spitter
Watch your condition, after picking you apartment
My voice said know this, I′ma heavy hitter
You've been puttin′ all the students through the ringer
Middle Earth, read between the lines
That's the middle finger
(ACC)
ACC (yeah) is the place to be (ayy)
We got VDC (ya)
Norte, Camino, Puerta del Sol
Comfort living is our number one goal (yessir)
And we got Plaza Verde
Planning for a future that's greener than our payday (money)
Got 2nd years in a headlock yelling "mayday" (woah)
And they say they hate it
But they keep coming back
Coming back for the year (yea, yea)
Keep it furnished, no need for that here
′Partment on training wheels, nothing to fear
Dorms 2.0, let′s keep that shit clear
Singles or doubles whatever you'd like
Got your own living room isn′t that nice? (ah)
Parking ain't free but that′s alright
'Eater Express here to give you a ride (yer)
Rent is due and don′t you forget it
Don't got the funds then just put it on credit (swipe it)
Move somewhere else and you'll live to regret it
Murdered the beat better call it a medic
($League)
Who won?
Who′s next?
Epic Rap Battles of Irvine
